I don’t have time for that. Who has time for that? How does (s)he find the time?
We are a time obsessed society in the stupidest of ways. I can’t watch Suits/Orange is the New Black/the news I don’t have time. I can’t workout/meal plan/take care of myself because I don’t have time.
What do we find time for? To berate ourselves for not being a better housekeeper, mother, friend. To hate our bodies. To hate ourselves for having a brownie, glass of wine, plate of nachos.
We find time to bitch about how we don’t have any time.
Some of us wear our lack of time like some sort of badge of honour. I’m just SO busy. How can I possibly _____________ (fill in the blank)? I. don’t. have. time.
Yes you do. We all do. We just choose to do silly things with our time. What is true though is that time is not infinite. It runs out.
I was reminded of this today upon hearing of someone’s passing. That person is out of time. This person’s family is out of time to spend with their loved one. They literally do not have time.
It’s crushing. I was not close to the person who passed but my heart hurts for those who were. I cannot imagine the immensity of their loss, their heartbreak, their grief.
They do not have time.
Take a moment and let that sink in. Everyday we run around healthy and happy (pretending we have so many things to not be happy about and some genuine difficulties as well) but at the root of it all we say we don’t have time. Or we’re too tired. Too tired to call that friend we haven’t seen in months. Too tired to go visit our grandma/mom/dad/best friend from Grade 3. Too tired to read at night with our kids. Too busy to stop and just listen to our child, spouse, and even ourselves.
The things I’ve listed above are things I do on a weekly, if not in some cases, a daily basis.
What I see now is that I have time. I have a lot of time but I don’t have infinite time. None of us do.
And so I invite you to join me in yet another effort in our, or maybe it’s just my, war against excuses. Make time. Use your time better. Don’t necessarily trust that there will always be a “later” or a tomorrow.
Do it for yourself and do it for those who truly don’t have time.